You and I Are Too Old to Starve Ourselves...Especially of Joy

Too Old for This Sh*t: How to Take Your Life Back from an Ageist Society

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I really, really hate pumpkin spice. I’m in the minority. Love it? Go get yours!

September 11th was a day when many of us old enough were recalling where we were on the day the Twin Towers were hit and life in America as we knew it was over.

This September 11th was also a day, like every other day, when you and I, regardless of politics, could choose joy.

I checked a bit of news, spoke to my best friend, swept up some dog hair (a hopeless gesture, let’s be truthful here) and was wondering what to do with the day. It was raining, moody, cool. My feet were so painful that I wasn’t sure I could do the Coast hike, which is nearly always the order of the day.

Many choices in front of me. But I could choose joy, above all.

In fact, I did go to the Coast. I did walk. Paid for it later, but it was joyful. That’s the whole point. Choose joy.

Because we don’t know how many more Septembers we have left.

A while back I got a comment from a reader whose name I forgot to copy and paste to this so that I could give her credit. I did get permission but feel ridiculous; still her comment really resonated and I’m sharing it here:

Photo by Toa Heftiba on Unsplash

I will be 72 next month. During Covid I managed to take off 50 pounds through revamping my eating habits and daily walking. After having a hysterectomy 12 months ago, five pounds have creeped (sic) back on. I have been making myself crazy trying to lose them, to no avail. It's time to just stop my foolishness. Yesterday I caught myself thinking "well, no pumpkin coffees for you this autumn, too much sugar." Then the thought surfaced wondering how many autumns I had left in my life. Do I really want to die while still trying to lose weight? So l will stop writing this right now, get into my car and go buy the damn coffee! (author bolded)

This comment was the inspiration for this article. It hit me hard.

As I drove home from the coast yesterday, the great trees which had been so severely damaged in last January’s ice storm up here in the Pacific Northwest were beginning to drop big fat leaves. I’d just been in Texas for a week, and we were getting an early fall rain. Trees were already tipped with bright red and orange.

I am in heaven this time of year. I have deadlines and to-do lists and demands and every imaginable damned thing to keep me from being in Nature’s embrace right about the time She is at her most glorious.

Am I going to put my nose to the grindstone and work and work and work, possibly to die sitting at my desk like Denise Prudhomme, 60?

When Denise clocked in that morning at 7 am, she had no idea that her life would end in her traces, sitting at her desk, working for a company that measures keystrokes instead of heartbeats.

That how I choose to go out? That how anyone wants to go out, slumped over a desk at a company that clearly doesn’t give a damn?

If you work for yourself, do you treat yourself in the same heartless way?

I have. That’s just one reason I started going to the Coast every Wednesday. It gives me joy. I deserve joy. YOU deserve joy.

Photo by Tran Mau Tri Tam ✪ on Unsplash

So two things. First, it’s not only about the weight, it’s about your health.

If life is all about lose weight lose weight lose weight, then we will stress ourselves to the max, draining ourselves of all kinds of joy by being worried about our waistlines. I’ve done it. Not worth it.

Do I think many of us could drop a few? Sure. It depends. But trying to get a 25” waistline back at 71? Nope. What is a tiny waistline going to get me?

Great question.

Personally, I can’t have refined sugar. However, during my week in Texas, finding good food out in the vast rural areas was a real challenge.

Two days in a row I had a couple of Starbucks mocha frappucinos. Forty-five grams of sugar EACH, which meant that given the dietary guidelines (for women, no more than 25 grams total per day) I was overdosing.

I paid for it, too. Big time. I won’t do it again.

For me it was situational- which is a kind reminder to all of us that too many folks live in food deserts and can’t get access to any kind of decent nutrition.

The greater lesson was that the occasional treat, like my commenter who loves pumpkin coffee, is part of life. Part of joy. A little touch of hot autumn joy before we run out of autumns.

Denise Prudhomme ran out of autumns.

At some point, we all will. Will you be so disciplined about losing weight that you can’t allow yourself a touch of joy in Nature’s most glorious season?

It’s not about the weight. It’s about lifting some of the weight life lays on our shoulders with a touch of joy every so often.

Okay, more than that. Lots more joy.

I’m with her. My choice for joy is likely more outdoors time rather than a sweet treat. Know your limitations, know what you can and can’t safely have based on your unique body.

Then, if a spiced pumpkin coffee gives you real joy,

….get in the car and go get that coffee, before autumn is over.

Let’s play.

Photo by Aiden Rosewell on Unsplash

Thank you for taking the time to hang with me on this lovely fall day. September is almost done ALREADY…what have to you done for yourself? For those of you below the equator, how have you celebrated spring so far?

What joy have you allowed yourself?

If this inspired you a bit please consider supporting my work here:

If someone close to you needs a reminder to give themselves permission to have joy, please also consider

Either way, please play. Today.