Oh, gosh, I love this piece. One of the things I LOVE about Substack, too, is the fact that there are so many older writers here. Fantastic ones, at that. And each of us is approaching this whole aging thing in a unique way. So, we get to learn from one another. Lean on one another. We get to sift through and take advice from one another that suits us. It's really quite remarkable. One of the things I want to do, and intend to do, is dive into Substack more. For me, this will be work, yes, but it will also be doing one of the things I want to do.
And house maintenance...Oh, man, don't get me started. And yard maintenance - that's a whole other deal. We are thinking about downsizing in the near future.
Love your photos. Mika is a sweetie. And a handful, I'm sure. Just got a puppy here, so I relate to all the puppy crazies.
Finally, just have to mention, I love your closing line: "Let's live our memoir." Amen to that.
I hear you regarding taking care of a house. Mine always has repairs and maintenance. Luckily, I love to create art and have just started an art business. It has helped me cope with the never-ending tasks, repairs, and upkeep required when living in a house.
Recently, my brother asked me what was on my bucket list. I told him I didn't have one. The reason I don't is because I've already achieved the life I want; if I died tomorrow, I will have died a truly fulfilled person. Because I have immersed myself in art, which soothes me like nothing else can.
Thanks for mentioning my post. I’m giving myself two more years in this oversized, needy house before I relocate somewhere with less work. I could change my mind, but today, when I am dealing with repairs, an ant invasion, and upcoming surgery, I think I will be ready. Keep up those beach walks and encouraging us to play.
OMG that’s so familiar. I’m up north of you right now in Lincoln City, spending most of my time close to the windows and watching the surf crash into the waves. If I have to leave this behind it will hurt, but honestly, not having the option to continue to travel and do the things I really love has finally gotten my attention enough to make the decision. I am going to thoroughly enjoy one more year, continue to pack, communicate to the Universe that I am ready for the next chapter and we’ll see where that leads. Who knows, Sue? So many adventures ahead!
I sold my huge house in 2021 because of all the reasons here - maintenance, renovations, taxes, etc., were eating up my free time and funds. Plus it locked me into making a certain salary to support. Now I’m in a small apartment which I love, but I realize how much I miss having outdoor space, a garden, and the option to make renovations to my living space. I also would love to have more community or live in a community environment. I’m looking at a Tiny Home this weekend, I am also interested in the Container Homes and there is a place in Oregon City that builds those. I am looking at home share options as well as any community options I can find, good luck to us all!
Kate,, these are the things that every single one of us gets to juggle when it’s our turn. Give up this to get that, mourn what we lost, notice what we didn’t plan to be sad about, look around again, all the while time slips by us. Honestly. As I sit here working, looking out over the Oregon Coast and seriously contemplate returning to altitude and a mountain life, I wonder if I will resent myself for doing it? So many tradeoffs. I was looking at small homes along the WA State corridor, too, but the tradeoff there was too damned far away from essential amenties as we age. So much to juggle .
I have written about moving to my homestead in the Columbia River Gorge at age 50 and believing this was my forever home. I have loved my time here, growing food,herbs and flowers in my huge garden. It was an escape from the boring conventional life I was living.
But at 66, I am tired of the maintenance on the house. Tired of dealing with feet of snow here in the foothills. Tired of the 30 minute drive to town. So like you, I am spending the next year doing some major decluttering and prepping the house for the market next summer.
Like you, I love the PNW but am planning a visit to Portugal this winter as I believe I can live there for less money and affordable healthcare.
I remember your earlier comments about this, Sue. I looked at the Hood, the prices were too high and honestly, I am done with snow myself after fifty years of it. I can handle PNW cold and only occasional flurries. That said, to your point, having made this big decision (and we’ll see what happens with the market), I am packing, prepping and planning. Meanwhile I hope to suck in every bit of gorgeous coastline I can before I move…wherever that is!
For many reasons I sold-out and fell into the rental gambit and some days feels like prison. Costs rise, maintenance doesn't show up. Patio too tiny or ghastly hot and sunny to enjoy and yes, no more artsy purple, red and gold walls!! I'd even take a light aqua.
Cannot leave out vehicle maintenance, 14 days still awaiting a new transmission nearing a $7000 tab, hole gets deeper. So many walkabouts to the grocer and to breath freshness, if not a tropical storm flooding my trail.
I keep trying to let go of should have, could have, and write my constant gratitude to stay positive but it always comes back to financial freedom or a stint of good health. My bucket list grows faded, the world is crashing, and I wonder if I'll end up solo pushing a store cart with a tarp and a pup. Maybe then I finally won't need my to do list.💁🏻
Hoping healing comes along nicely, adorable Mika shares that chair, and the beach walks never end. Always find such meaning and thoughts from your words!💞
That's so familiar, Birdy. I get irritated at myself for what I couldn't possibly have known or understood at the time, as if as if. We do the best we can with what we have right now. thanks so much.
It gives me joy to see what a gorgeous (if shabby) haven you and Mika have found while you recover. And you ask such good questions, the ones many of us who are fortunate to own a house must wrestle with as our runway grows shorter. My hubs and I adore our neighborhood and love our house, but it's getting to be a whole dang lot to keep up with, so I feel you. And times are indeed uncertain to say the least. But that's the gift of approaching mortality, right? We don't have to worry about how Everything will turn out, and meanwhile we're lucky to have options.
Loved this post thank you. I'm 63 this year so it resonates very loudly. I'm accutely aware of time passing at warp speed. The house thing is easier for us because we downsized a long time ago and there is not much maintenance. The 'what to do with my time thing' is more difficult. I conciously stepped away from some stuff this year and feel I have too much free time. Weird! I've always wanted it and now I don't know what to do with it.
The shocking privilege of free time and boredom….and so many of us consider it a burden to be bored when we are so fortunate to be able to just be. Just BE. So much creativity can come of quiet when I stop trying to fill every waking moment in that Calvinist compulsion to be so damned preoccupied. What a gift you have right now. Thanks.
I started with a small house and never went bigger. Mine is 850 sq ft with a 150 sq ft converted garage that is mostly a utility room for laundry, pantry, freezer, etc. I’m mainly getting tired, not of the maintenance of the property, but the constant need to declutter. I can’t seem to get to the point of getting rid of all the things I don’t need. Work is the main thing that interferes with doing what I really want to do which is to downsize my stuff and just be in my house and spend time in my gardens, and various home projects I enjoy doing. I want to bake and cook and garden. I want to make quilts and have people over for dinner on the patio. I want to take day trips and shorter 3-4 day trips. I’m not that good of a longer trip person. I’m 62 with a SS full retirement age of 67. My plan is to hang on keeping a job until I’m 65 and qualify for Medicare and then go back to being self-employed as a bookkeeper and tax preparer. As I get much older I’m eyeing tiny home communities where you’re living even smaller but have a community garden and other group activities and rides to wherever you might need. I live in Austin so this is an option here and more of them popping up.
I have a ton of maintenance work at our country property. My wife and I want to move, but my parents are still living on it. That’s a problem that will eventually solve itself, but in the mean time we are stuck and can’t downsize without kicking them out.
I’m imagining a time soon where we can have more free time and less grass to mow, less snow plowing, less roofs to fix, less of everything like that.
I can relate to everything you wrote here. If you ever want to explore further North than the Oregon coast, come up to the Washington Peninsula along the Hood Canal.
This is where we have chosen to go into our last years and it is very much like what you’re looking for. Time is precious and you need to go to where you can get the best of yourself and Mika💜
Thanks for sharing this deep reflection. I'm at a similar existential crossroad. Managing a home (an old one) and making it what I want it to be takes precious time and resources. If only I had no responsibilities! I pine and whine...and blame everyone and everything but me for not making my "wild, precious" life a priority.
Hi Julia,
Oh, gosh, I love this piece. One of the things I LOVE about Substack, too, is the fact that there are so many older writers here. Fantastic ones, at that. And each of us is approaching this whole aging thing in a unique way. So, we get to learn from one another. Lean on one another. We get to sift through and take advice from one another that suits us. It's really quite remarkable. One of the things I want to do, and intend to do, is dive into Substack more. For me, this will be work, yes, but it will also be doing one of the things I want to do.
And house maintenance...Oh, man, don't get me started. And yard maintenance - that's a whole other deal. We are thinking about downsizing in the near future.
Love your photos. Mika is a sweetie. And a handful, I'm sure. Just got a puppy here, so I relate to all the puppy crazies.
Finally, just have to mention, I love your closing line: "Let's live our memoir." Amen to that.
Hi Julia,
Mika is adorable!
I hear you regarding taking care of a house. Mine always has repairs and maintenance. Luckily, I love to create art and have just started an art business. It has helped me cope with the never-ending tasks, repairs, and upkeep required when living in a house.
Recently, my brother asked me what was on my bucket list. I told him I didn't have one. The reason I don't is because I've already achieved the life I want; if I died tomorrow, I will have died a truly fulfilled person. Because I have immersed myself in art, which soothes me like nothing else can.
Thanks for mentioning my post. I’m giving myself two more years in this oversized, needy house before I relocate somewhere with less work. I could change my mind, but today, when I am dealing with repairs, an ant invasion, and upcoming surgery, I think I will be ready. Keep up those beach walks and encouraging us to play.
OMG that’s so familiar. I’m up north of you right now in Lincoln City, spending most of my time close to the windows and watching the surf crash into the waves. If I have to leave this behind it will hurt, but honestly, not having the option to continue to travel and do the things I really love has finally gotten my attention enough to make the decision. I am going to thoroughly enjoy one more year, continue to pack, communicate to the Universe that I am ready for the next chapter and we’ll see where that leads. Who knows, Sue? So many adventures ahead!
Indeed. Let's free ourselves for the next adventure.
I sold my huge house in 2021 because of all the reasons here - maintenance, renovations, taxes, etc., were eating up my free time and funds. Plus it locked me into making a certain salary to support. Now I’m in a small apartment which I love, but I realize how much I miss having outdoor space, a garden, and the option to make renovations to my living space. I also would love to have more community or live in a community environment. I’m looking at a Tiny Home this weekend, I am also interested in the Container Homes and there is a place in Oregon City that builds those. I am looking at home share options as well as any community options I can find, good luck to us all!
Kate,, these are the things that every single one of us gets to juggle when it’s our turn. Give up this to get that, mourn what we lost, notice what we didn’t plan to be sad about, look around again, all the while time slips by us. Honestly. As I sit here working, looking out over the Oregon Coast and seriously contemplate returning to altitude and a mountain life, I wonder if I will resent myself for doing it? So many tradeoffs. I was looking at small homes along the WA State corridor, too, but the tradeoff there was too damned far away from essential amenties as we age. So much to juggle .
I have written about moving to my homestead in the Columbia River Gorge at age 50 and believing this was my forever home. I have loved my time here, growing food,herbs and flowers in my huge garden. It was an escape from the boring conventional life I was living.
But at 66, I am tired of the maintenance on the house. Tired of dealing with feet of snow here in the foothills. Tired of the 30 minute drive to town. So like you, I am spending the next year doing some major decluttering and prepping the house for the market next summer.
Like you, I love the PNW but am planning a visit to Portugal this winter as I believe I can live there for less money and affordable healthcare.
I remember your earlier comments about this, Sue. I looked at the Hood, the prices were too high and honestly, I am done with snow myself after fifty years of it. I can handle PNW cold and only occasional flurries. That said, to your point, having made this big decision (and we’ll see what happens with the market), I am packing, prepping and planning. Meanwhile I hope to suck in every bit of gorgeous coastline I can before I move…wherever that is!
Much to think about here. Plus your dog companion Melissa is a Zen mistress.
Actually it's Mika, and Melissa is my buddy in Denver. Neither would mind a bit
ANYWAY, dogs can teach us so much.....
And people!
Amen ! & A - Women !
For many reasons I sold-out and fell into the rental gambit and some days feels like prison. Costs rise, maintenance doesn't show up. Patio too tiny or ghastly hot and sunny to enjoy and yes, no more artsy purple, red and gold walls!! I'd even take a light aqua.
Cannot leave out vehicle maintenance, 14 days still awaiting a new transmission nearing a $7000 tab, hole gets deeper. So many walkabouts to the grocer and to breath freshness, if not a tropical storm flooding my trail.
I keep trying to let go of should have, could have, and write my constant gratitude to stay positive but it always comes back to financial freedom or a stint of good health. My bucket list grows faded, the world is crashing, and I wonder if I'll end up solo pushing a store cart with a tarp and a pup. Maybe then I finally won't need my to do list.💁🏻
Hoping healing comes along nicely, adorable Mika shares that chair, and the beach walks never end. Always find such meaning and thoughts from your words!💞
That's so familiar, Birdy. I get irritated at myself for what I couldn't possibly have known or understood at the time, as if as if. We do the best we can with what we have right now. thanks so much.
It gives me joy to see what a gorgeous (if shabby) haven you and Mika have found while you recover. And you ask such good questions, the ones many of us who are fortunate to own a house must wrestle with as our runway grows shorter. My hubs and I adore our neighborhood and love our house, but it's getting to be a whole dang lot to keep up with, so I feel you. And times are indeed uncertain to say the least. But that's the gift of approaching mortality, right? We don't have to worry about how Everything will turn out, and meanwhile we're lucky to have options.
I’ll drink to that. We do have options, some anyway, and as I play with them I hope to keep that sense of play.
Loved this post thank you. I'm 63 this year so it resonates very loudly. I'm accutely aware of time passing at warp speed. The house thing is easier for us because we downsized a long time ago and there is not much maintenance. The 'what to do with my time thing' is more difficult. I conciously stepped away from some stuff this year and feel I have too much free time. Weird! I've always wanted it and now I don't know what to do with it.
The shocking privilege of free time and boredom….and so many of us consider it a burden to be bored when we are so fortunate to be able to just be. Just BE. So much creativity can come of quiet when I stop trying to fill every waking moment in that Calvinist compulsion to be so damned preoccupied. What a gift you have right now. Thanks.
I started with a small house and never went bigger. Mine is 850 sq ft with a 150 sq ft converted garage that is mostly a utility room for laundry, pantry, freezer, etc. I’m mainly getting tired, not of the maintenance of the property, but the constant need to declutter. I can’t seem to get to the point of getting rid of all the things I don’t need. Work is the main thing that interferes with doing what I really want to do which is to downsize my stuff and just be in my house and spend time in my gardens, and various home projects I enjoy doing. I want to bake and cook and garden. I want to make quilts and have people over for dinner on the patio. I want to take day trips and shorter 3-4 day trips. I’m not that good of a longer trip person. I’m 62 with a SS full retirement age of 67. My plan is to hang on keeping a job until I’m 65 and qualify for Medicare and then go back to being self-employed as a bookkeeper and tax preparer. As I get much older I’m eyeing tiny home communities where you’re living even smaller but have a community garden and other group activities and rides to wherever you might need. I live in Austin so this is an option here and more of them popping up.
I have a ton of maintenance work at our country property. My wife and I want to move, but my parents are still living on it. That’s a problem that will eventually solve itself, but in the mean time we are stuck and can’t downsize without kicking them out.
I’m imagining a time soon where we can have more free time and less grass to mow, less snow plowing, less roofs to fix, less of everything like that.
I can relate to everything you wrote here. If you ever want to explore further North than the Oregon coast, come up to the Washington Peninsula along the Hood Canal.
This is where we have chosen to go into our last years and it is very much like what you’re looking for. Time is precious and you need to go to where you can get the best of yourself and Mika💜
Thanks for sharing this deep reflection. I'm at a similar existential crossroad. Managing a home (an old one) and making it what I want it to be takes precious time and resources. If only I had no responsibilities! I pine and whine...and blame everyone and everything but me for not making my "wild, precious" life a priority.