You and I Are WAY Too Old to Pay Good Money for a Lazy, Substandard Trainer
Too Old for This Sh*t: How to Take Your Life Back from an Ageist Society
One woman’s story tells it all. Chime in with your take, please.
Here’s the skinny on
. First, she’s not skinny, but she’s fine with that, because she’s fit. She wasn’t, just a few years back.At 73, and back then carrying an extra 85 lbs., Penny’s a retired geologist with a passion for spinning, which keeps her seated a good bit of her time. She and her husband had a working farm, but Penny hadn’t been taking the best care of herself.
She’s been following me for a while, from Medium.com to my blog to here.
One day this Texas farm girl wrote me that she had gotten tired of my constant banging the drum about fitness….wait for it…..and instead of telling me so long, she admitted to having been working out with a personal trainer for some six weeks already.
Loving it, in fact.
She’d never set foot in a gym before. And now, she’d found a trainer, a gym, a routine, and over time, strength and benefits she hadn’t seen coming.
Long story short, this new routine changed her life in many ways. While she didn’t lose all the weight she’d like, what she got in strength, endurance and overall health improvement made up for that.
Every so often I’d post an update when Penny wrote me. I have permission to tell her story because Penny knows that someone is going to be motivated by her decision, especially the fact that she didn’t start until quite late in life. So let’s catch up.
Penny and her husband recently sold their farm, rehomed the animals and moved closer to town, family and services. They’re now in their late seventies, and this was a strategic move. I’ve periodically heard about her new gym but it was clear that this was a part of her move that wasn’t working.
Then I just got this comment:
I have decided I need a new gym since getting a new trainer at my current gym is problematic. My trainer is a very nice young man - 28 years old. In the 5 months I've been training with him, he has only reminded me to drop my shoulders, tuck in my tummy, or sit up straight a couple of times. He has never commented on my breathing or my counting or much of anything else. I try to do my workouts in the best of form but I haven't been doing this long enough to be sure I always know what that is. He doesn't have a plan for me and only seems interested in whether I feel like I'm meeting my weight loss goals. Well, I don't have any weight loss goals although weight loss would be great. He also doesn't seem to think that I need to work on flexibility or balance.
I bring all this up because I finally figured out if I want to work on the BOSU ball, I need to come in on my own and do it. Just like I need to be on my own to do deep assisted squats which really help my knee and ankle flexibility or to work on any of the plate machines or any of the free weights. He is willing if I demand to use these different machines but next time I have to demand again.
I am truly amazed at what a wonderful trainer I started out with. I didn't realize at the time that she was perfect for me. She created a very high standard that I'm trying to find again. (author bolded)
First, here’s what I would do:
FIRE THE LAZY BASTARD.
He’ wasting your time and money. Dump him. You’re pouring money down the drain.
Not only that, let the gym know that he cost them your membership. I’d also put it on Yelp. Feedback bites, but I have zero patience for this kind of non-performance. He’s done it before and will do it again if people don’t speak up. This type banks on your not knowing the difference.
You do. BOOT HIM.
Second, you’re fairly close to a big city. Google trainers for seniors. Ask for referrals, do your due diligence.
Third, make a laundry list of what you want and expect for your training dollar. You already experienced the gold standard. List everything you can remember about your first trainer. Check must-haves and put an x next to the nice-to-haves. This gives you negotiating room.
Addendum: Here is Penny’s laundry list of why she loved her first trainer taken from her comment, below:
I continue to be amazed that my first trainer was so wonderful. I signed up with the only gym in the small town of Columbus and they suggested I hire Stephanie since she is so good with newbies. Little did I know that I would get a trainer who was a nurse by training and who loved anatomy and kinesiology. She was always on the lookout for what I needed or would benefit from. She kept the workouts fresh and had me working out in all areas of the gym from the very beginning. She gave me homework I could do at home or when traveling that only required a chair or a mat on the floor. And then she followed up to make sure I was doing what she thought I needed. She was completely involved in my workouts and totally invested in my accomplishments. She shared her enthusiasm for the exercise and despite my initial assumption that all exercise would be horrible, she taught me to love every bit of it - even the specific machines/exercises that I hated. I could always see how I was progressing and why doing the exercises I hated were so important. She taught me to revel in the process. (author bolded)
Please note: for those in this field, try to top this list. I can’t think of a higher bar, especially for those clients who are new to the gym and who expect to hate it.
Then, set the upper limit on what you will pay an hour. See if your next gym will allow you to bring in your own trainer. Or the existing one, although I don’t think you much care for it.
Research local YMCAs and community centers which might be more likely to have trainers for seniors, but don’t drop your standards. If you can, watch them in action and then ask other clients-who are like you-what they think.
Interview them thoroughly. All of them. In fact, if you can, pick a few and do an introductory hour. Take your time. You should be able to tell who’s going to work out pretty quickly.
This is YOUR life. YOUR time. YOUR money. YOUR body. YOUR fitness. YOUR investment.
For those who never hired a fitness trainer and are thinking about it, please see this article.
You might well end up with someone even better than your first. But not if you’re stuck with this loser.
I swear I sound like E. Jean Carroll for lonely gym rats ISO the right trainer.
I’ve been lifting for 51 years. Have worked on and off with trainers many times, and my standard is VERY high. When you pay upwards of $65+ an hour, you have every right to fire substandard talent.
I’m now soliciting Dear Reader for suggestions, as I’ll bet plenty of you have ideas.
This is a serious investment in yourself, and you deserve a partner who is committed to you. That said, we have to show up on our end as well, which is a different article.
While this is for Penny, this is for ALL of us who pay a chunk of cash for serious skills. Stop settling.
Demand what you paid for. Or to quote E. Jean’s “farting walrus:”
YOU’RE FIRED.
Your life. Your time. Your body. Your money. You are worth top talent.
Let’s play.
Thank you for spending time today. I hope this article served, and I hope you got value. If so, please consider
And natch, if someone you know could use this information please also consider
Either way, protect your investment in YOU and make sure that those you hire are committed to your best health.
Julia - as always, I love your responses. Thank you.
I continue to be amazed that my first trainer was so wonderful. I signed up with the only gym in the small town of Columbus and they suggested I hire Stephanie since she is so good with newbies. Little did I know that I would get a trainer who was a nurse by training and who loved anatomy and kinesiology. She was always on the lookout for what I needed or would benefit from. She kept the workouts fresh and had me working out in all areas of the gym from the very beginning. She gave me homework I could do at home or when traveling that only required a chair or a mat on the floor. And then she followed up to make sure I was doing what she thought I needed. She was completely involved in my workouts and totally invested in my accomplishments. She shared her enthusiasm for the exercise and despite my initial assumption that all exercise would be horrible, she taught me to love every bit of it - even the specific machines/exercises that I hated. I could always see how I was progressing and why doing the exercises I hated were so important. She taught me to revel in the process.
Damn, I miss her.
I’ve fired my Chiro and Physio as well. I have to do my own research into what works for me. No one seemed to be able to help me recover from a hip injury but after months I have figured it out and I am finally recovering. I am learning to trust my own instincts.