You and I Are Too Old to Justify Eating Crap Food Simply Because We're Old
Too Old for This Sh*t: How to Take Your Life Back from an Ageist Society
Not the article I thought I’d write but it is the article we need to read
My buddy JC lovingly accuses me of being curmudgeonly in my Too Old articles, and he’s right. I usually start with a bark, and then end on a high note. This is no different.
We had dinner in Salem last night, and his partner was with us. She’d just had stomach reduction surgery. That step has made a huge difference in her health. I was so pleased to see her walking normally for the first time in years, and able to enjoy small bits of food as her body sheds the weight.
She’s in mid-life. JC is 41. They both love food, they are excellent cooks. It’s a challenge for them as well as for me to manage the waistline as we all age.
But we all love a treat, right? LIFE IS JUST SO GODDAMNED HARD. Besides, once we pass midlife, don’t we bloody well deserve that goodie, that snack, that whatever?
It depends on what kind of life you’re willing to forfeit for those goodies.
Here’s my take, given that my family went through this with my parents, whose dietary habits plummeted along with their health as they aged.
Getting older is no excuse to claim that “I deserve this pizza,” or “I deserve this enormous piece of cake.”
As I ordered my salmon salad, this landed on the table next to us (I asked permission to photograph it, and the woman about to dig in was taking photos of it herself):
Here’s the description of that menu item:
Mile High Mud Pie
Kona coffee ice cream & Cookies ‘n Cream ice cream on an Oreo cookie crumb crust. Topped with Whipped cream, caramel, and almonds. Served in a pool of hot fudge. $9.99
Here’s what you’re shoveling into your pie hole with this thing:
Nutrition Facts For a Serving Size of 1 serving (669g) Calories 1360 Calories from Fat 747 (54.9%) % Daily Value * Total Fat 83g - Saturated fat 30g - Cholesterol 170mg - Sodium 1180mg 50% Carbohydrates 244g - Net carbs 239g - Sugar 205g - Fiber 5g 20% Protein 22g Vitamins and minerals Fatty acids Amino acids *
This thing is easily eight inches high. I shudder to think how that mile-high mass of sludge is going to affect her body.
Two hundred and five grams of sugar.
I have done this myself. I LOVE desserts like this and have ended up scraping the plate even after an entire meal. Been there. Done that. My body and brain suffered for it, too.
To that, I offer this article by my favorite online nutritionist
, whose piece today inspired mine:
Please read this. PLEASE read it.
Every time I’m in a Starbucks and I watch people order drinks which aren’t just calorie-laden but laced with tons of sugar, I have to wonder if we are telling ourselves “it’s just a coffee.”
It’s not a coffee any more than the above Mile High Mud Pie is just a little dessert.
Just in case you like to use that excuse about how it’s just a coffee, please see this article which outlines the nutritional content of those drinks.
As a nation, what we drink, from juices to shakes are among the worst offenders in terms of sugar, often in the name of “eating healthy.” You might eschew a 460-calorie Starbucks Iced Pumpkin Cream Chai Tea Latte, but if you trade it for a medium glass of cranberry juice you’re still getting 26g of sugar and 358 calories.
You and I are WAY Too Old to fool ourselves into eating junk, crap and life-altering substances and complain about being depressed.
Cross’s article underscores the reality of how sugar is one of the main sources of our mental health collapse.
I read another piece yesterday which touched on a lie that so many of us believed and still believe, and which is connected here:
We have a mental health crisis in America. How much of that is driven by this godawful junk food, sugar- and carbohydrate-loaded diet of ours? It’s a question being actively researched.
Some 60% of our diet is ultra-processed. If Cross is to be believed, and she does her research (and has written a book on brain health to boot, kindly), then you cannot separate the two.
Diet has a massive impact on mood, see this article on the microbiome.
So we eat crap, our bodies get sick, we get depressed and Big Pharma is only too happy to load on life-altering, seriously dangerous pills. Meanwhile we keep eating Mile High Mud Pie or the equivalent and blaming our malaise on “bad brain chemistry.”
And we wonder how we got where we are today with our health.
Is it all that simple? Of course not.
Each of us has unique circumstances and unique conditions to manage. I'm just addressing two overarching areas where you and I have considerable agency and choice, assuming we don't live in a food desert, which too many do.
What I did
I changed my diet and lost some 85 lbs 36 years ago. Later I took myself off life-killing meds that doctors foisted me on the basis of false diagnoses.
My goodness the difference those two things made. Whatever challenges I have right now have more to do with normal aging and the stupid stuff I do for sports, which can on occasion put me down for a while.
That’s very different from being down mentally and physically because of my diet. I’ve been there too- so this article is a reminder for me every single time I longingly eyeball a dessert like that Mud Pie.
Am I telling you to do what I do? No. I’m suggesting that you and I challenge the excuses we make for ourselves and our loved ones, including our elderly parents, when we say things like “they’re old, they should be able to eat what they want.” “I’m stressed out, I'm going to gorm this pint of Ben and Jerry's.”
NO. They shouldn’t. Nor should we.
If anything, the older we get, the more discipline and responsibility are necessary. We face loss of balance due to inner ear changes, sarcopenia if we don’t exercise, dizziness and vision issues if we eat crap food along with over- the-counter meds mixed with prescriptions.
It’s a perfect storm for falls and debilitating illnesses right at the time when we most desperately need a clear brain, a strong body and our faculties.
As I age into my seventies, I keep junk food out of my house and my diet. I exercise a lot. I don’t drink or smoke or do any kinds of drugs. I surround myself with challenging and interesting people. I do my best to keep up on the science, and keep up with those writers whose work reflects solid research, like Cross’s and others.
That doesn’t make me right. But it sure as hell makes me healthy.
If I fall, it’s likely because I mean to, either because of a skydive or a bungee jump or balance work on a BOSU ball. I can't do any of that if my brain and body are screwed up by dietary choices.
My friend's partner told me last night, with genuine pride, that for the first time in years she was able to walk the length of a beloved beach without needing to sit down.
That's the true dessert. The real sweetness, if you will.
My friend is already sampling them again.
I want you to have that sweetness, too: the sweetness of a clear brain, sharp thinking, a healthy body, options and the best possible life. In every single way I want you to have your best life at any age.
The occasional treat won’t hurt you. A habit of treats all day, every day?
If your treats are trees, Nature, exercise, good company, beach walks, healthy food, adventure served the way you like it, and life options, then I am all in on sweet treats.
May your days be filled with such sweetness.
Thank you for reading my stuff. If you’re inspired please consider
This work takes time and effort, and it’s how I pay my bills. If you believe this is worth the cost of a coffee (PLEASE read the label on your Starbucks), please consider
If you know someone who is struggling with sugar, please consider
However you take in my stuff, you’re sweet to do so. Thank you.
We are indeed surrounded by garbage masquerading as food and drink, but once you recognize it as garbage, it's surprisingly easy to ignore. Alas, there is still the problem of equity: my husband and I can access and afford quality food — that's not the case for way too many Americans.
What! You and I are quoting all the same people. Great message, I hope the right people read it.
My parents are both of the "I'm old, I can do whatever I want" variety. If I ate the garbage they do daily, I wouldn't be able to stand the off-gassing from my backside.
I don't understand how the mac n' cheese, hot dogs, onion rings, ice cream, and fried chicken haven't polished them off yet. But I do know that they aren't as healthy as they could be, and diabetes and arthritis are making their lives miserable, so they aren't getting away scot-free.