Should I Leave or Should I Go? When You and I Are Too Old to Spend the Last of Our Years in Dire Circumstances, Well...

Too Old for This Sh*t: How to Take Your Life Back from an Ageist Society

Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash

One author takes this very seriously. Here’s how it’s going, Part I

Dear Reader: Are you thinking about moving overseas? Many of us are writing about it. I will include others’ pieces where I think will add value. I’m not going to blow smoke where the sun doesn’t shine; rather I hope to shed light on those considerations people don’t take into account. My focus is on Ecuador, but the general observations are likely universal. Your input is most welcome. First of two parts, with occasional updates to follow.

This morning, here in Cuenca, Ecuador, is very cool. We’re at 8,000 feet, the sun can be brutal. We’re subject to sudden heavy rainstorms during the day. Frankly, it’s gorgeous.

I’m seriously considering moving here.

To that, please see the following article by fellow Stacker

Gerard DeGroot

:

American Exodus

Americans ARE thinking about leaving. Lots are. Including this writer. I was faced with this nearly three years ago when my income was sandblasted by Medium, as has happened to lots of other folks over there recently.

That income was key to both my survival and thrival. Disappeared overnight.

I looked very seriously at both Thailand and Colombia. Packed, sold my stuff, put the house up for sale. No takers.

Realized in March ‘23 that I was, indeed, living in my dream house, then I recommitted. I dumped tens of thousands into deferred maintenance, and did my level best to make up all the income I’d lost. Meanwhile I limped through some seven surgeries, sleeping on my couch, slowly unpacking my stuff all over again.

Then two big water emergencies, the whole house was torn apart for months, construction, ladders, painters, floor people….both my house and I were under construction. That wiped me out financially and then some.

Thank god for credit cards and the VA, but geez Louise.

My income has never recovered. Not even close. Many can relate. Combine that income loss with rising costs and spiking inflation, like many, I am faced with some hard choices if my fixed income drops even a little.

At 72, I can see the end of the runway. As I wrote the other day, what am I going to do with the time that is left to me?

Retirement isn’t an option. The question is whether or not I can survive in the States with the changes that are already underway.

So with all due respect to my Trump voting friends who honestly and sincerely think that what’s happening is a good thing, for many of is it is quite the opposite.

Dan Rather’s piece, which I also read this morning, lays a lot of it on the line.

Did Anyone Not See This Coming?

Aging in and of itself can lead to financial disaster in America. It’s expensive to age, and it’s really expensive to age badly.

One of the primary reasons I write about health and nutrition and attitudes towards aging is because I want the interim journey to be full of life and hope.

People like my friend

Jim the Geek

write regularly about how they have turned their health around late in life, which is why I tag his work. He’s one of many whose story is inspiring and serves to make the point that lifestyle, movement and dietary changes pay off handsomely. They give us better options.

We all want options. All of us, eventually, run out of them completely.

My time is going to run out sooner rather than later.

How we end is partly up to us and partly up to the frivolity of the gods. Those elders who have family and who have plenty of money may well go out better than most.

Of all the issues that potential expats discuss, healthcare costs rank at the top. It’s an unholy terror even if you’re healthy, but particularly stark if you are, like me, completely solo, without a fat bank account.

Whatever happens with this president, it will take decades to undo the DOGE’s damage done to critical institutions. Too many of us don’t have decades and many may not survive what it may cost.

So do you high-tail it to another country? Is that the answer?

Photo by Jezael Melgoza on Unsplash

As I did in summer/fall of 2022, I’m researching those options right now.

EVERYTHING IS PERFECT OVER HERE COME ON OVER

First, there are plenty of websites devoted to moving overseas. Portugal, Italy where you could buy a decaying homestead for a dollar, Thailand where forests are being leveled for Western retirees.

All sounds wonderful. At first.

Many ex-pats ( immigrants, by another name) have never traveled. They truly don’t have a clue what is required of them to live well in another culture.

Too often they drag their American attitudes with them. They complain how they can’t get a can of Jif peanut butter or the Internet service is spotty or the weather isn’t perfect or worse, NOBODY SPEAKS ENGLISH AROUND HERE.

Happily, there are plenty of other American immigrants who work very hard to fit in, learn the rules and the culture, and find ways to add value to their new roosts. Those stories encourage me, particularly because there are countries only too happy to welcome American know-how into their economy.

I’m no expert on ex-pats. One guy who is, is worth reading and looking up: Tim Leffel, whom I count as a friend.

Read the experts. Everyone else is suspect, including this writer. That said,

I’ve been to 47 countries. Spoken to ex-pats everywhere. The folks who don’t last are the ones who don’t do the research and are shocked to the core at what will be required of them to adjust.

Here is the one guarantee: you will be regularly uncomfortable, sometimes deeply so, you will be regularly inconvenienced, perhaps constantly, guaranteed deeply so.

The harder you resist blending in, the harder the blender will chew you up and spit you out.

For those who are brave enough, you will grow in all kinds of ways.

Biggest mistakes I hear about include: First, people who read International Living, get religion, sell everything and land in their new country without bothering to conduct any kind of advance reconnaissance.

Second, it appears that the most offensive requirement is to learn the language.

Americans are unique in that we think that everyone else should be forced to learn English rather than we expand our own brainpans. Should I move to Ecuador, and it’s a possibility, I love the idea of being immersed in Spanish.

I’m way overdue to learn it, and besides, it’s a boon for the aging brain.

Finally, people are constantly pissed that their new country isn’t America.

That still rocks me back on my heels a bit. All I can think, uncharitably, is you don’t get out much.

People say they’ve traveled, and their passports have the stamps to prove it. If all they’ve done is stay in expensive resorts run by American companies, they haven’t traveled.

It pays to strip that thick, self-righteous American bark off our brains and get out there to experience the world in all its poverty and pressures and amazing incongruities. The more you explore the less bothers you.

Shit happens, and you learn that it doesn’t matter. A train that’s five minutes late? A temper tantrum over five minutes? Try waiting two days for a train because of a war, an accident, a strike.

Travel teaches you to be enormously grateful that there IS a train.

Travel is the world’s greatest teacher but not if you stay in a protective bubble.

Once ex-pats find out that living anywhere else is still just life, full of frustrations and broken pipes, broken hearts and irritating neighbors and late repairmen and all the things. When that reality lands, the vacay is suddenly over.

For them, and quite understandably, it’s just easier to deal with all that crap where they understand the rules. And the language.

I suspect that this is why people turn around and go home. Garage sales are a regular thing on Gringo Post, and consignment stores selling gringo furniture have popped up here in Cuenca. Need a sofa, recliner or good table?

Wait a while.

As war, terrorism, climate change, religious persecution and other factors force millions to leave their preferred lands and venture forth, often with little more than hope, it’s possible if not very likely that plenty more Americans will seriously consider making the move to another country.

As DeGroot points out, most will explore becoming expats, but when faced with the enormity of the impact, they decide to stay where they are.

Just keep in mind, Westerners largely have options. Those fleeing with nothing more than their clothing often did not. A little grace in understanding the world goes a very long way.

Move and everything will be perfect? What a load of horse puckey.

If you choose to move overseas, expect lots of challenges. I sure do. Rules and laws around things like real estate are not mirrored overseas. It may not work out, but you will never be the same in some genuinely wonderful ways, if you let the experience mold you.

Is it for you? No clue. I’m researching it thoroughly. Today I met with the first of two different moving companies. Tonight I meet with another American expat, a single female. Tomorrow more of same, then Sunday I spend the day horseback riding again.

If all goes as hoped, I will be coming back in May for another three weeks to do plenty more research. I can make all the plans I like. Hell, if my house doesn’t sell, as happened before, then I guess I get to unpack all those boxes again.

It really helps to have a helluva good sense of humor as you age.

It helps us play.

Photo by Juan Pablo Malo on Unsplash

Thanks for reading. This is a public post because I know that many folks have this on their minds. Thank you to new readers and old alike. Especially thanks to those who support my work. Believe me right now it matters much more than you may realize. I’ll explain more about that in Part II, coming shortly.

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